Irresistibly smooth

My world crashed down with a panic attack at the airport a month before the pandemic shut everything down - the stomach issues began as well. That was a horrible morning of dreading the trip, sweating profusely, overwhelming anxiety that I ignored and shoved into the deep recesses of my soul. I trudged into the airport, approached security when I saw the flight board that listed my flight as delayed. You may think that is a good thing, but this just provided more time to dance with the dread. I found a long lonely hallway, sat down and the squirrel caging in my mind amped up ten, twenty, fifty times - it was debilitating. There were several bathroom visits before I finally grabbed my stuff and walked out of the airport, found my car and sped home - the rest of the day hiding in bed. I visited a doctor, then another doctor, downed anxiety medication and then off to the gastroenterologist - the colonoscopy and the endoscopy were scheduled when the pandemic lockdowns eased somewhat - multiple very long Q-tips jammed up my nose into my brain (I'm not crying, it just hurt). Nothing was revealed, the doctor's eyebrows raised. There were more doctor visits and pills and then over-the-counter solutions with lots Internet searches with discussions on IBS, Crohn's, various diets, anxiety and on and on. At one point, I went to the emergency room and the doctor refused to enter the room - peeked in with mask firmly in placed, asked questions and disappeared. After some time, I felt alone as the doctors basically told me to go away and therapists told me to just do yoga and learn how to breath better. It is funny, the anxiety only appeared after the stomach issues arrived. I lost 30 pounds, but I received compliments instead of concern. I found a holistic practitioner, had a food sensitivity test and eliminated a lot of foods. The problems persisted. I took vitamins and supplements, more money down the drain. I'm not big on social media, but I often scrolled through Twitter as the world continued a partial shutdown (what else could I do?) and a post from The J.M. Smucker Company grabbed my attention - an enormous peanut butter recall due to salmonella which could lead to gastrointestinal issues and nausea. My jaw actually dropped, I jumped from my recliner and went to the kitchen - you see I am (or was) a huge peanut butter fan. No, seriously, I ate it ALL OF THE TIME. This was especially true when my stomach ached or I felt nauseous, I would eat a peanut butter sandwich since it was simple and plain. I pulled all of the jars (four) and checked their serial numbers with the list from Twitter - all a match. I immediately texted the wife, she was shocked (I suspected she thought I was losing it). The peanut butter was discarded or returned and yet another food was eliminated from my diet. I had a doctor appointment (check-up) shortly after where I excitedly shared the news, she shrugged and went through her checklist. That was a year ago and while I still cannot eat peanut butter. I tried to join a lawsuit, but there had to be proof of salmonella in my stool (yeah, gross) and it was no longer present (yeah, I had it check, and gross again). The stomach issues have calmed down, not completely gone but I have always been an anxious person so some of it was always there. I've slowly reintroduced long-forgotten foods to my diet and a lot of the weight is back. With all of the trouble and sickness, nobody ever raised the possibility of food except for the food sensitivity test but it identified a bunch of other foods (that was worthless) and it never crossed my mind that I had poison in my cabinet. Upon doing some research, these type of product recalls are common, so now I am always on the lookout. One doctor related fact, all the of the weight loss and diet changes made no dent in my high cholesterol numbers - hilarious.